literature

Wind Boy 18

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WishIWould's avatar
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Literature Text

Dad caught sight of my faraway form, and it was like he suddenly remembered I was there. A big grin spread across his face and he took a dive in my direction. He and Amanda both returned to where I waited, he rumpling my tunic and laughing, she giggling. I felt the tiniest prick of jealousy. I'd never be able to race with her like that, so fast that she had to fight to keep up and was reduced to breathless laughter after.

The two of them phased between shimmering translucency and their human-like colorings, as wind spirits are wont to do when they're high-energy. Amanda elbowed me, and I smiled.

"So Sky," Dad started, his eyes bright. "I told you about our plans, right?"
This little transition has been difficult to get out? After composing and recomposing it in my head and on several post-its that I subsequently lost, I finally got it down at work today and kept the post-its in my pocket. :) Kind of boring, but there ya go.
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Frotu's avatar
I feel like you are setting up a lot about the father-son relationship here without out-right addressing it, and I think that's wonderful. Like suddenly remembering that Sky is there... that is such a telling statement to make about a parent. I think it colors a lot about what his relationship is like with Sky as well as with Sky's mother and kind of explains a bit about why things worked out the way they did.

And the gentle jealousy I really like as well! Given that it's about Amanda, I certainly see how that could possibly be an undertone - that he can't participate in activities with her the way that others can. And then a flavor of it that he's just kind of on the outside, as has been discussed before. 

But what about these plans, I wonder! It leaves things on a gentle cliffhanger of seeing where things will go from here...